Crystal Hefner Details “Robotic, Odd” and AWFUL Sex with Hugh Hefner on January 25, 2024 at 8:02 pm The Hollywood Gossip

Crystal Hefner has opened up about something both very personal and, unfortunately, very painful.

On Tuesday, the former centerfold released her memoir, Only Say Good Things: Surviving Playboy and Finding Myself.

Of note across the Internet in the wake of this release, Crystal delves into what her sex life was like with Hugh Hefner, the founder of the aforementioned men’s magazine… who sounds like a rather terrible human being.

Hugh Hefner and Crystal Hefner attend Playboy Mansion’s Annual Halloween Bash at The Playboy Mansion on October 25, 2014 in Los Angeles. (Photo by Charley Gallay/Getty Images for Playboy)

Crystal — who married Hefner in December 2012 and who was still his wife when Hefner died in September 2017 — writes at one point about how she snagged an invite to The Playboy Mansion and was then selected to make her way to Hefner’s bedroom.

Once there, Crystal says she noticed a chandelier covered in underwear — “like some kind of carousel of trophies” — while a great deal of adult entertainment played on four televisions around the bed.

She said she was told to change into silk pajamas… and then Hefner pulled out a locked box with a joint in it.

Crystal pretended to take a puff and then?

“He grabbed a bottle of baby oil off the nightstand and oiled himself up. Then he looked up at the four of us and waited.”

Hugh Hefner and Crystal Harris arrives at the TCM Classic Film Festival’s gala opening night world premiere of the newly restored film “A Star Is Born” at Grauman’s Chinese Theatre on April 22, 2010 in Hollywood, California. (Photo by Alberto E. Rodriguez/Getty Images)

Continued Crystal Hefner:

“He gave an impatient, questioning smile and opened his hands in a gesture that suggested, ‘Who’s first? Let’s get a move on.”

Ever since his death, more and more first-hand reports have come out about Hugh Hefner, with numerous ex-partners saying he pushed drugs on them and tried to control their every move.

In 2022, long-time girlfriend Holly Madison referred to the Playboy Mansion as toxic.

Hugh Hefner and Crystal Harris arrive at Stansted Airport on June 2, 2011 in Stansted, England. (Photo by Dan Kitwood/Getty Images)

According to Crystal in her book, “there were no condoms in sight.”

Nor was there any “kissing or romance or intimacy” involved in the “odd and robotic” love-making.

She felt it was “like Hef was just going through the motions of something that had once been fun and sexy,” before saying she was the second woman to mount him that first night.

“My body wasn’t ready, but it didn’t matter because of all the baby oil. I was very much outside my body watching the show,” she writes.

“Above the bed was a huge mirror, and while I was on top of Hugh Hefner having sex with him for the first time, he didn’t look into my eyes once. He stared to the side and up, watching the view from above in the mirror.”

Crystal Hefner attends the Premiere of ‘My Truth: The Rape Of Two Coreys’ at Directors Guild Of America on March 09, 2020 in Los Angeles. (Getty Images)

This all sounds so nauseating.

“There was nothing sexy about it,” Crystal continued. “This wasn’t about making love. It was about power and control and leverage. It was a performance. I was auditioning for a part.”

At one point, Hefner brought out some sex toys and the women around him pretended to use them.

Shortly afterward?

Hefner “suddenly” waved them off his loers and “grabbed himself to finish the job,” Crystal writes.

She described the final moments as Hef “moaning and flailing and flopping like a fish trying to get back to water” — saying “his face contorted as if he was in pain” and calling it, “the strangest five seconds of my life.”

Hugh Hefner poses at Playboy’s 60th Anniversary special event on January 16, 2014 in Los Angeles, California. (Photo by Charley Gallay/Getty Images for Playboy)

As for that baby oil?

“We were all getting infections from the baby oil — it wasn’t supposed to be used as lube,” says Crystal.

“I tried to tell him … but you couldn’t really tell him anything he didn’t want to hear. We tried to replace the baby oil with lube, but when we weren’t looking, he would always switch it back.”

In general, Crystal felt Hefner “had never taken a moment in his entire life to figure out how to please someone else,” saying that for someone who was “the poster boy of sexual liberation,” she never left the bedroom feeling “very liberated” herself.

Only Say Good Things: Surviving Playboy and Finding Myself is available now wherever books are sold.

Crystal Hefner Details “Robotic, Odd” and AWFUL Sex with Hugh Hefner was originally published on The Hollywood Gossip.

Crystal Hefner has released a memoir in which she delves into what it was like to sleep with the founder of Playboy. It sounds terrible.
Crystal Hefner Details “Robotic, Odd” and AWFUL Sex with Hugh Hefner was originally published on The Hollywood Gossip. 

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